Wednesday, June 17, 2009

“IÂ’m waiting here for my life to change,
When the waters stir you can rearrange me.
Just one touch is all I need,
IÂ’ve nothing much but the wounds I feel,
IÂ’m looking for the hand of the miracle man.

Holy, you are holy,
Who was and is and is to come.
Holy, you are holy, Savior, Healer,
IÂ’m standing at the feet of the miracle maker.”

                            (part of the “ Miracle Maker” – Delirious?)

My heart is tight… I need your touch, touch of holiness, touch of cure. I can´t leave out my feeling, the soul is not to be crucified… however I can´t work with base at my feelings, can´t leave myself to the emotions. Oh Lord! Sometimes that is so confused, so difficult… how many times I hurt somebody? Or suffocated?... I don´t have anything unless the wounds I feel, no conquest, no glory, no lordliness. I can only be standing at your feet Lord, crying for your touch. I not trust in me to justify myself anymore, so I wouldn’t do this… my place is not upstanding face to face you, and so standing at your feet.

I love you Jesus! My Lord! Above everything!

I can´t continue doing this.

I trust You to calm the storm in my life, and raise me again!!!!


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Sunday, June 7, 2009

I don´t know how many time or how many cases, I employed my meaning as it were absolute truth, and not only in situations of my life as well as the lives of others. When someone asked me an advice or simply opened your heart, I ordered him, and no direct him to look for the solution, basing me in thoughts that were in agreement just with my vision, and so many times that´s broken principle and no conform to desire of God.

Why it? What make me taking decisions (include decisions in other lives) basing me in my meaning, my emotions, my thoughts. Maybe I am a super christian, and I don´t need pray a lot cause the all of desires of God are in me, or judged that “john” is unable to learn with God. In fact, my mind don´t work so, but I operate as if it were so. I conclude that this occurs because everyone has something within himself, a justice sense, or better, a strong injustice sense, which is similar to ideas that we have without asking why. Notwithstanding I don´t use my mind or my emotions to take decisions today, I figured that I acted based in this “justice” sense. Maybe this is the cause why the active persons were so dictators sometimes (there want to talk at any cost, but… why?), and why the calm persons feel wronged more easily (this is injustice practice too!).

The truth is that nobody is free from mistakes (sin), until the last moment everybody (include me) will subject to this corrupt human nature. So we mustn’t let to think, but after we prove our thoughts we must use the faith to take a decision. No forget:

Faith to think

Reason to believe

This post isn´t a public confession only, it´s a warning to us. We have still much dirt, and any natural decision could be remnant of that old nature. We must base in principles to do (reason to believe), decide on faith (faith to think), aware that

"Every Christian cause an impression in one way or another, through their conduct. Every step you make a chord vibrating throughout eternity. Every step you touch in keys which sounds will reverberate throughout the mountains and valleys in the sky and all the dark caves and galleries of hell. In all the movements you are exerting influences that will affect the interests of eternal souls around ... "(Watchmann nee)

and Lord justice is love, love that give a grace (through Jesus sacrifice) so that we act for free!

God bless you!

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Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Some words can explain a act and a fact, others can explain a feeling and a life. These months I founded one word that does describe a necessity, in really my necessity: rest. And that´s it made me understand a little more about the coverage of the meaning of faith.
Time to time appears thinks, dreams, ideas, opportunities, troubles, feelings, in addition to form a storm, a hurricane in our minds where every is conflict, and try to get away is wearing and seems pointless. Maybe the solution would be stop thinking, but we aren´t so, our lives aren´t so. If I stop thinking, others thinks will appears; if I stop dreaming, absolutely others dreams will appears. So stop to do these things is going on in other storm, a bigger storm, cause in our minds all it will add up, we never leave our minds empty, in fact we try think in other things.
That doesn´t mean there isn´t solution. Let me try explaining. I thought that I would explode, but something prevented, like a strait jacket. But this force was smooth, good. I began to base that, and little by little my mind improved and I recognized that force. I can remember the stories about heroes of the past. Abel, Noah, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, all of them lived in age of wars, hungry, troubles, and they died without seeing the promise with theirs human eyes. But with faith all of them seeing the promise with their spiritual eyes, and us know that the promise was obey. Moses would have gone by cost, however God order him, and he gone by desert and die before seeing Jerusalem.
Now I know! I was done with thinks, dreams, feelings, my life was done with opportunities and troubles, but I don´t need scared, just have faith. Not worry about getting the goal. But do what God ask for us. Simple that. Rest in Lord.
My work is believing, hug the Lord who cares of me and love me.

“All these came to their end in faith, not having had the heritage; but having seen it with delight far away, they gave witness that they were wanderers and not of the earth.” Hb 11:13